With Our Eyes Wide Open
by furyofthetimelords
Summary: As the two Sentinels of the Ark, Clarke and Bellamy meet once every fifty years when the other wakes from Cryo. These are the seven most important times they meet. AU


With Our Eyes Wide Open

 _950 Years to go_

When she wakes up, it's about as graceless as her first trial. Her chest heaves painfully as her mind switches back on before eventually jolting her into consciousness. For a moment, she's not sure where she is, and her mind races to catch up. Once Clarke remembers herself, she's sitting up in her pod and stretching, working out the kinks. Fifty years a long time to go without a good stretch.

"And so the princess awakens," a familiar voice says just as Clarke finishes her final stretch. She turns to look at the person and takes a moment to place his face before smiling.

"Well, beauty sleep is important," Clarke says to Bellamy Blake, or, as her mission briefing refers to him, Sentinel One. It's strange to think that the last time she saw him was fifty years and a good hundred light years away. Not to mention they were still on Earth. He still looks pretty much exactly the same as before. In fact, if all goes according to plan, she'll probably only see him for about ten days in the next 950 years. Their mission is simple: to maintain and watch over the bodies that sleep below them and record everything until the Ark reaches Delta 34-b, the new home of the human race.

"I hope you enjoyed it then, because that might be the last good rest you get in a while," Bellamy tells her. "Unless of course you can work out what the hell making that clanking sound."

"You're kidding," she says with a groan and lies back in her pod for a moment.

"Nope," Bellamy replies. "Come on, let's go."

Clarke takes a deep breath and focuses on getting out of the pod. It's not exactly an easy effort, let alone graceful, but she eventually gets out and stands on her own two feet.

"You're not too bad at this now," Bellamy notes. Clarke rolls her eyes. She doesn't believe him. She's always been terrible at adjusting from sleep cycles, so much so it's a wonder she even made it on the mission.

"Sure," she replies dryly.

"The first time you did we thought you were dead," Bellamy says. "Now, you're awake on the first try."

"Don't remind me," she says. That first time in Cryo was awful, so much so she still feels kind of sick thinking about it.

As she attempts to walk out of the room, her legs give out and she's tipping over, but before she can hit the floor, Bellamy grabs her arm and steadies her.

"Easy there," Bellamy says and Clarke leans against him, grateful for the support.

"Thanks," she tells him as she finds her footing. Once done, Clarke smooths out the newly formed wrinkles on her sleep suit. The material feels strange and slimy under her hands.

"So, get dressed in there and I'll tell you about the last fifty years," Bellamy tells her.

/

As it turns out, not much actually _did_ happen in the past fifty years. Clarke is almost disappointed. "It's strange, actually. After the first year or so, I almost stopped keeping track and then suddenly the Ark tells me another decade has passed me by," Bellamy says.

"Surely _something_ happened."

"It really didn't - unless you count that clanging sound. I haven't been able to fix it."

"You didn't try to learn?"

"It slipped my mind."

The rest of the conversation is simple and light; Clarke enjoys it after all those years asleep. It might have felt like no time at all in her head, but she knows it's been so long since Bellamy has spoken to anyone. She wonders how lonely it will be for her. Clarke has never minded solitude, but she knows that fifty whole years is a long time to only have yourself to deal with.

She's been through the training simulations so many times and she wonders how it'll compare to the real thing. Will she like it? Hate it so much it'll drive her mad?

"You'll get used to the silence," Bellamy says when she asks.

"I hope so," Clarke replies. "I don't want to go mad."

"You'll be fine," he assures her. "It's me I'm worried about. I'm too used to be being awake."

"Sleep is the easy part," Clarke says.

/

It's lonely without him there and the days stretch out endlessly, emphasised even more by the distinct lack of sunlight and physical ageing. The only thing that really reminds her that time is actually passing, is the ancient windup wristwatch her father used to own. She turns it as often as she can, though Clarke's sure she's managed to miss hours, if not days of time.

To keep herself entertained, Clarke films her video updates, while watching back on Bellamy's. They're sporadically timed things, only updating when he remembers or something dramatic changes. The higher ups were very specific about keeping up with these recordings - every fact must be documented, especially since they're the only humans out here to witness this (nevermind the hundreds that sleep below). Bellamy somehow manages to make his videos entertaining, and Clarke more often than not looks forward to watching them. It's better than the mundane mind puzzles or old Earth dramas and like that the Ark Project's creators had installed on the ship's database.

She knows her first videos are awkward and stilted, but over time she works to become a lot more friendly with the camera, eventually working up into slipping in little anecdotes about her life on Earth, or some funny joke she made up or remembered. Another side effect of this is that she starts to feel closer to Bellamy - sure, they hadn't hated each other before the mission began and they were decent enough friends, but now she starts to really feel a connection to this man. It's a strange thought, but Clarke doesn't mind it.

 _700 Years to go_

He wakes up cold, and for a minute, that's all he knows. Cold ice seeping into his body and his mind is a mess of sensations and memory all tangled into one. But then his consciousness catches up and he's grounded again.

"Morning, sleepy head," a voice says as Bellamy opens his eyes. It takes him a moment to adjust to the light and then he seems a girl—no, woman—standing in front of him, a soft smile on her face.

 _Clarke_.

"It's good to see you," he says, smiling. The gesture feels strange on his face.

He focuses in her, wondering about the changes in her face since he last saw her. She doesn't look that much older, but compared to most of his memories of her, it's clear she's aged some. However, it still feels strange to realise that this is Clarke, already hundreds of years old.

"Well, don't get used to it. You're a little late this time. I've got a few hours," she says, but sadly.

"Really?" he asks, feeling a pang of disappointment. He's started to really look forward to days like this.

"Yeah, I think the machine might need a little adjusting. Or something."

Bellamy pulls himself out of the pod; he's anxious to get started on the little time he has with her now. There's always so little of it that he holds into every moment of human interaction.

"Whoa, slow down," Clarke says and puts a hand on his shoulder when he nearly falls over. The touch feels oddly electric, but Bellamy chalks it up to his newly unfrozen nervous system. He might need to check on that later.

"I'm fine," he insists and takes a few steps to steady himself, but Clarke still has her hand on his shoulder. He finds he doesn't mind it there.

 _450 Years to go_

This time, they fight after she wakes up.

This fight is by no means the first they've had, but it's probably the worst.

"I just don't see the point of all of this," Bellamy says over their meal of rehydrated, bland food.

"You don't think it's worth giving us all a second chance?" Clarke replies with a frown.

"I think we're wasting time on a someplace else when she should've been thinking about how to fix our home."

"But we couldn't, could we? That's the point here. Besides, we should see what's out there."

"The Earth could've been fixed, if we'd tried," Bellamy insists." This whole thing is just another waste of time."

"It's not."

"We're going in blind!"

"The place has already been cleared of signs of alien life and we just terraformed it. It would be a waste to give that all up."

"We could've fixed out own planet."

"There was nothing left there, Bellamy. We killed it," she reminds him, using the same words the President of the Commonwealth had used in his final speech to announce the Ark Project. It was a dark day for everyone and she feels a little awful bringing it up, but her anger has been stoked.

"There was more we could've done. If we can terraform a fucking planet, then why can't we save Earth?"

Clarke feels her nails biting into her palms. She wants to scream at him, to yell, or maybe even hit him for being so stubborn, but she holds back. He's about to go into the long sleep, and bruising wouldn't help at all. Besides, she knows violence wouldn't solve anything.

"You don't know what you're talking about," he says.

Clarke takes a deep breath. "I think you should go to sleep," she says as evenly as she can manage.

"Then maybe I will," he says and walks away, not even bothering to finish the meal in front of him.

 _400 Years to go_

He wakes up alone this time. Instead of being there, Clarke had set the automated process. He looks at the monitor, which tells him she's already been asleep for several hours.

/

Bellamy isn't wrong. The years are lonely and he often catches himself in a moment, wondering if he could wake her up for a moment, engage the emergency wake-up system just to talk to her. But that's a selfish thought and he shuts it away – even if he tried that, it would probably only make her madder. He tries to content himself with her videos, but they're simple updates, no more of her stories or fun little jokes.

He wishes he could make it up to her somehow, and he spends a good ten years trying to think of the right words. Eventually, though, they do come and by the time it's her turn to be awake, he's ready to tell her.

 _350 years to go_

Waking up feels tougher than it had before, mostly because part of herself wants to cling to the sleep, let the next hundred or so years pass her by and leave Bellamy to watch the years turn. But the system won't let her do that. She has to wake up.

"Clarke," she hears the moment her eyes flutter open.

She pulls herself up out of the pod slowly, not meeting his eyes. The fight is suddenly fresh in her mind, like it only happened the night before. She'd done a good job of trying to forget it, but now with him physically here, she's thinking about it all over again. It's petty and she's aware that she should've gotten over it by now, but she's adjusted almost too well to this life

"I'm sorry," he says softly. "I shouldn't have said that. I know how much this whole thing means to you."

Clarke blinks in surprise at his words – never would she have thought he'd just apologise. She'd expected self-righteous anger and stubbornness, not this.

"Oh," is all she can say. Bellamy seems to take this as a sign and continues.

"I—I just wish we'd had more time on Earth, I guess. I hate that we never really got to grow up properly there, or even do much else. I mean, there was some time, but the more I think about it, there wasn't enough. We should've had more time," he says.

Clarke doesn't hesitate to reach out and hold him. It's a surprise to them both - in the time they'd spend together, there wasn't much reason to do so, apart from the odd helping hand when they wake from Cryo. But the hug is well accepted by Bellamy, who puts his arms around her and keeps her close. It's a comfort she hasn't had in a very long time. She almost wants to cry with how good it feels.

"I'm sorry I got so angry," Clarke says into his chest.

"You don't need to apologise," Bellamy says softly, right into her hair. She holds him for another long moment and reluctantly lets go. She's about to step away from him completely and give him back his personal space when she notices the look in his eyes.

There's a brief moment of hesitation before she kisses him.

The kiss in itself is nice, though a strange sensation after so long without doing it - she's well aware she's quite out of practice (she hadn't had a girlfriend, boyfriend or partner in over half a millennium. That was an odd thought). But Bellamy responds enthusiastically, his hands pulling her closer to him, so they're practically pressed right up against each other.

Before she knows what's going on, she's tugging at his shirt and then it's gone. Bellamy's hands are on her sleep suit, pulling at the velcro and Clarke lets him peel it down to her waist, embracing the feel of his hands on her bare skin. For a moment, she pulls away to get a good look at him, taking the sight of him. He's looking back at her, eyes appreciatively scanning her body.

"You don't look so bad for 675," she says appreciatively and reaches out to touch him again, tracing patterns on his skin.

"Neither do you, sleeping beauty," he replied and leans into the touch. The look on his face only serves to make her feel even more electric and turned on.

"I try," she replies and presses a kiss to his shoulder. Bellamy responds in kind and pulls her closer, kissing her again. Every nerve in her body feels alive and Clarke doesn't want this to end, though she's well aware it has to sometime.

 _Might as well make the most of it_ , she thinks and moves a hand to his crotch. He's already half-hard.

"Are - are you sure?" Bellamy asks a little breathlessly. Clarke feels a little smug at having put him in that state, though she's probably just as much of a mess as he is.

"I am. You?"

"Of course."

Clarke smiles at him and Bellamy moves to pull her sleep suit further down her body and presses kisses to her body, trailing down. The conversation drops off then, and before long, they're completely naked and lost in the sensation of touching each other. Her orgasm comes pretty fast and at any other time she might have been a little embarrassed, but she reasons that's been a while and maybe being with Bellamy is just that good (besides, he comes almost as fast as her, peaking just as the last wave of her own orgasm rushes through her). Either way, she's happy.

Afterwards, they lie together for a while, kissing lazily while Bellamy gives her brief updates on the Ark.

"I could get used to this," she tells him while he's letting her know about a heating malfunction.

"We'll have time to soon," he promises.

He kisses her just before he goes into Cryo. Clarke concludes it's the best day she's had in decades.

 _100 Years to go_

After their first time together, touch becomes a cornerstone of their relationship. In that one day they have together, Bellamy wants to keep close to Clarke, and she's more than happy to oblige ("We have plenty of time for space later." Clarke jokes when he brings it up). It's not always about sex, though as he comes to find. Initially, he worries it might just be a proximity thing, but then he hears her laugh or recalls a joke from one of her video updates, he realises there's no one else he'd rather be with.

While the other sleeps, they've started to talk to each other via the video messages - though they don't attempt anything sexual. The computer system would probably put a ban on that as soon as he tried. So, most of their conversation is still in anecdotes and jokes, though they've long since run out of Earth stories. Nowadays, Bellamy tells stories about heroes of old and alien races, while Clarke makes sketches of the stories on her tablet. It's a strangely intimate thing and he enjoys these conversations across decades, every addition taking fifty years or more to be received.

It's an odd way to live, but Bellamy doesn't care, just so long as he gets to be with Clarke.

 _Three hours to go_

And then the Ark arrives at its destination. The planet looks like a shining beacon in the darkness, everything she's been waiting for this whole time.

"Land, ho!" she calls out gleefully. The excitement is palpable now. She's had so many years to think about it and to have it so close feels like a dream. And being the first human to set eyes on it gives her a certain kind of thrill.

Clarke rushes out to wake up Bellamy, practically sprinting to the sleep pod.

The process seems to take painfully long this time and she taps her fingers nervously as she waits. "Come on," she mutters, willing time to move faster.

Eventually, he wakes up, coughing and shaking as he's being pulled into this new world.

"We made it!" she practically yells, even though he's probably still quite sensitive to sound.

"Did we?" he asks, the moment his vocal cords are unfrozen.

"Yes! It's right outside," she says excitedly, and pulls him upright. "You _need_ to see this right now."

Bellamy pushes himself out of the pod and nearly falls out in the rush. Clarke grabs his shoulder to steady him.

"Just like old times," he says with a smile and presses a kiss to her cheek. She takes a good look at him now - though he barely looks that much older than when he began this mission, the years are still reflected in his eyes. Clarke knows she probably looks the same. It makes her wonder what life will be like living with so many people who've slept the past thousand years. It's a little strange to realise she's going to be able to see some of her old friends and family, but it's also exciting. She can't wait.

"This is better," Clarke replies honestly. "Come on, let's get to the bridge."

/

When the ship lands, Bellamy cries.

"I can't believe it," he says through his tears. Clarke pulls him close and feels her own eyes well up. Finally, after all these years, they've reached a new home. And they're the first humans to really see it.

"Me either. After all this time, we're here."

"I can't believe it. We're _home_."

"I've been here for years," she replies, just because she feels like being sappy.

Bellamy kisses her softly. "Yeah. I guess you're right, Princess."

* * *

A/N: so this has been in my drafts for quite a while now (around half a year, maybe more) and I figured it was time to maybe post it. So, I brushed it up a little and somehow ended up adding in the closest thing to smut I've ever written which is really pretty tame compared to a lot of what people have written honestly but w/e.

A "mood" playlist for the fic:

Soil, Silt & Clay - The Lonely Forest

The Source - The Naked and Famous

We Are Leaving - The Naked and Famous

He Dreams He's Awake - Stars

Twenty Seven - MS MR

Tomorrow - A Silent Film

The Consequences of Not Sleeping - Little Green Cars

Oblivion - Bastille


End file.
